Happy February!

Wow! Time is flying by!

So far, January has been a reflective month for me. I was kind of depressed for a week simply because I realized that I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I hate that. I feel like at times, I feel so sure then at other times I’m clueless.

Lately, I’ve been talking about a whipped body butter business and last month, I was whipping up a storm. One day as I was mixing, my sister asked me if I could see myself doing this every day. At that moment, I got discouraged because the fact of the matter is that though I enjoy making butters, I think I like it more as a hobby than as a business.

No! Now what?

I used to want to be a politician but I didn’t network enough(that can still happen). Instead, I kept working and volunteering with kids which brought me to the teaching field. Now I’m a GED Instructor at a community college. I love it and if the salary was better and I could see myself advancing, I would be in paradise. However, the fact of the matter is that there are no prospects for a promotion of any type any time soon.

So a lot was going through my mind in January. I had also realized that this year marked 5 years since I got my Bachelor Degree and I still have no full-time job. Though, I’m aiming to save $10,000, it’s basically in vain because I am $80,000 deep in loan debt.
When all of these negative, frustrated and uncertain thoughts are going through my mind, I wonder how I should trust God in the midst of it.

Luckily, I went to church with my dad on the last Saturday of the month and I was BLESSED!
It’s been a while since I’ve been to church and leave truly inspired. The music was great and I actually felt God moving in the sanctuary.

The sermon was based on the story of Elizabeth and Zacharias, the parents of John the Baptist. The pastor preached on how these people did everything right. They were loving, law-abiding and giving. Everybody loved them. Most importantly, they loved and served God.

However, they were childless. From the moment they married, this family prayed for a child. Decades later, they still weren’t parents. However, in Luke 1:13 the Bible said that “God heard their prayer.”

The preacher did a great job pointing out two things:
1. They kept praying for a child even after Elizabeth had menopause.
2. God had answered their prayer from the very first utterance.

I find this amazing. God answered their prayer before it was manifested. In other words, God said yes to the couple years before it actually happened. In the meantime, Elizabeth and Zacharias kept praying not knowing God’s answer. They still kept trusting and having faith.

This inspired me because it made me realized that even though I don’t have that full-time job, even though I can’t pinpoint what career I’ll live, God has an answer.

I’ve been praying for 5 years and from the moment I presented my request, God had an answer. That is so reassuring. It is almost as if it already happened. The pastor said that the birth of John the Baptist was “a completed act of the past.” In God’s eyes, Elizabeth and John were already parents.

In God’s eyes, I’m already successful. I just need to believe it even if I don’t see it. My appointed time hasn’t come yet. I need to be patient. I need to keep on praying. I need to keep pressing on.

Don’t give up, Esther.

God has already answered.